About a month ago or so, my sister-in-law sent me a message on Facebook wondering if I would be interested in the two of us (JUST the two of us) meeting somewhere about halfway between Akron, OH (where she lives) and Baton Rouge, LA (where I live) and spending just a few days doing touristy things and hanging out.

It took a little planning and logistics but yesterday we both flew to Atlanta and got on the same flight from there to Nashville. We rented a car and drove to our hotel in downtown Nashville. After we got settled and all we walked down one of the main streets (5th Avenue, I think) where there were small little restaurants/bars and some little shops, all geared to country or at least live music. This was mid-afternoon, around 3 or 4. Several of these places had their doors open and you could hear and sometimes see live performers performing.

I’ve never been much of a country music fan, although my dad and mom kinda were. I did grow up watching Hee Haw, so many country stars from the 70s and 80s are familiar to me, and I do know some of their songs.

We went into a little rib place and ate something. Then we walked around some more. We came back to our hotel and then, around seven we headed out to a nearby mall and ate at a Ruby Tuesday. Not super exciting, but fun.

Today was our first full day. We went to the Ryman Auditorium which is the former home of the Grand Ole Opry. It was built to be a church in the 1800s and it’s lovely inside. In fact, it is called the Mother Church of Country Music.

We had our picture taken on the stage holding guitars and saw lots of memorabilia from country music stars. I may just find myself buying some country CDs!

Then we at lunch at Panera Bread right next door. We don’t have Panera’s in Louisiana so I eat at one whenever I can.

Then we went to Fontanel, a magnificent log mansion built by Barbara Mandrell’s husband. It was their family home for years and it was amazing. We got there about an hour before the next tour so we went into a small family-style restaurant (Farmhouse) that is at the parking lot for the tour. On the ceiling were about a dozen or so old quilts and both Elizabeth and I remarked how it made us miss Mom, who would have loved this trip and had a blast with us.

After that we went to the the Parthenon. I had promised my son I’d go as we’d seen it in the Percy Jackson movie. Turns out that the movie must have used a set or something because what I saw didn’t jibe with the movie but was more impressive and beautiful. Elizabeth took a bunch of pictures and I got a mug and a T-shirt.

Speaking of mugs, I collect them and I got three(one in each place we visited) before I thought possibly putting them in my suitcase was going to be a problem if this continued. So, no more mugs. I loved the Parthenon so much I also got a t-shirt!

Then we went to the Hard Rock Cafe down the street from our hotel and I got a souvenir glass with my drink! My last drinking vessel this trip! I promise!

Yesterday afternoon, I “introduced” Noah to a bunch of toys he hadn’t played with since he discovered the “joys” of the DVD player and Netflix Instant Queue, not to mention the Wii.

He went nuts, and I had to put new batteries in a very annoying truck that makes obnoxious sounds when you push buttons, but it was not a problem for me. I would rather have those sounds filling the house than him sitting on the couch watching old Power Ranger episodes over and over.

So this morning, after he finally got his breakfast eaten, he got out his trucks again and came into the room where his dad and I were and said, “Mom, where’s the screwdriver?”

Dad: Why do you want the screwdriver?

Noah: I want to play.

Me: Your VBS shirt is in the dryer. Get dressed.

A few minutes later (he’s not dressed).

Noah: I need the screwdriver.

Dad: You’re not going to play with the screwdriver.

Me: No. He wants it to take off the back of some toy to put batteries in.

Dad: Oh. Noah, get dressed.

Dad headed off to the Y to lift weights.

Me: Noah, did you take your medicine?

Noah: I need the screwdriver. You don’t want me sitting, just watching TV, do you?
( so proud – he gets blackmail at the tender age of nine.)

Me: get dressed.

Noah: I think you have to help me. I don’t know where my shirt is.

Me: (I just got my mouth open)

Noah: Wait. I know. You told me. It’s…

Me: In the dryer.

A moment later, he has his shirt on but hasn’t changed his pajama pants.

I’m glad he’s playing and I think I can tune the obnoxious sounds out. But taking him to Bible School in his pajamas won’t work.

If you’ve read much of this blog, you know that I feel lost most of the time when it comes to my kids’ schools.

Well, turns out that I’m apparently confused in the rest of my life, too.

Every year, I sign my son up for swimming lessons at the local YMCA. He LOVES the water and LOVES to swim. (A neighbor once suggested that we didn’t adopt him but found him washed up on the beach or something.)

EVERY year, I forget to write down the week that his lessons were, so I called the Y and asked. When they told me, I realized that there was going to be a conflict with his soccer camp (which runs from 9-12 every day) next week. I told them that the second week of his lessons would conflict so they nicely said I could keep the same weeks, but change the time to 4 pm from 10 am.

Okay, so the lessons started the day after Memorial Day, Tuesday, so we went to the pool at 3:45 pm. At around 4, the lifeguard asked if we were here for lessons and his name.

Turns out they didn’t have him listed for this week at any time! However, they had a class he could join. I asked the lifeguard if I’d screwed up and brought him to the wrong class. She said it didn’t matter because he would fit right in with a class already scheduled at 4 for his age. She suggested that maybe because the time was changed, that information was never conveyed to the right person.

The woman I talked to a couple of weeks ago did say she was going to have to write a note about Noah changing his time, so maybe, regardless of how this all looks, it wasn’t me who was confused this time!

News in the Brandt household:

Beloved is finally finished with business travel for a couple of weeks. This is a busy time of year for him. He went to Brussels the week before Halloween, and actually had a Belgium Waffle.

He came home Halloween night almost in time to take the Boy out trick or treating. Here’s what the Boy and his Mom (me) looked like.

He was a Jedi and I was the Ice Queen. I actually just stayed home and gave out candy, but I love dressing up. I wish I’d done something more with my makeup, though.

Our little guinea pig had his leg amputated due to an infection but he’s home now and eating and acting totally normally, except for hoping more! I’m very glad of that.

I got my hair done today. This is me at the hair dressers, during the “procedure.”

What was kinda cool about this was that I’m working on an urban fantasy that has as part of the location a hair salon and as I sat with the dye in waiting, I kept looking around (I was also writing) and thinking that this is kinda how I pictured the salon in my book. And this is where that part would happen and that other part would happen here.

It was cool.

Oh, and the after picture? Here you go.

It’s not the best lighting and my hair isn’t that blonde, but it does have some nice streaks in it that make me happy.

Saturday is the luncheon and I want to look pretty for it. I don’t know yet what I’m going to say or wear but I’ll be cute!

The longest Beloved and I have lived in one place since our marriage nearly 24 years ago was 8 years in Urbana, IL while he was in grad school. Actually, that’s not totally true as we lived in Champaign, IL for one year before moving to the other side of “town” and being in Urbana.

We’ve been here almost six years and in the last year, I’ve been realizing that soon we’ll have lived here longer than our last place and we never thought we’d leave there. I love Baton Rouge, and five years ago, I didn’t know I would ever say that.

I have more real friends here than I did in our last place where we lived six years. Closer friends. Friends I have actually gone to lunch or out for coffee with. Writing friends who understand me. I have a great little niche here and I’m happy.

Beloved’s parents moved here over a year ago, so we now have family here. The Boy barely remembers PA so this is home in so many ways.

Now, with the economy there is a lot of talk of budget cuts at LSU and Beloved is a little concerned that since he’s not faculty and research is one of the things that is going to be cut.

It’s a joke in our family that Nancy and her husband can’t stay in one place for too long, and that the Boy will never go to the same high school the Girl did.

In Pennsylvania, the pharmacist at our drug store knew me by name and knew all the drugs I take for my transplant. Her husband had kidney issues and we’d often talk about dialysis and transplant and all that. When we moved her and transferred the prescriptions, the pharmacist her said she sent me her best.

A few years ago, we moved to a different drug store due to our dissatisfaction with the customer service. Today, I went into our “new” one, and before I could ask for my prescriptions, the woman behind the pharmacy counter knew my name and also knew that I often pick up Rxs for more than just myself (both the Boy and the Girl take prescription medicine). She didn’t even ask for my address for confirmation.

I’m wondering if that means we’ve lived her too long!

Of course, my daughter said it’s better than the people at Cane’s Chicken Fingers knowing my name and my regular order! Maybe if that ever happens, we’ll need to move!

A year ago today, I was at my in-laws’ home. We’d just finished dinner and were heading to the living room to watch something on television when my cell phone rang. I thought, Hmm, who could be calling me; everyone is here.

Well obviously everyone wasn’t because it was my brother and as soon as he said my name I knew something was wrong. I thought immediately that his wife had gotten hurt. He said, “Mom is gone.”

He lived about 10 minutes from Mom in Ohio and he always called her a couple of times a day just to see how she was doing and such. He hadn’t been able to get hold of her so around 6 pm, he decided just to drive over and see what was up.

As soon as he walked in he knew something was wrong. None of her lights were on and her purse was on the table, so she hadn’t gone anywhere. He saw her lying in her bed and since she never napped, he knew.

She died in her sleep.

My mother was 81 years old, lived alone except for her dog, was a voracious quilter and sew-er, and was active in her church. There were cookies on her table that she’d baked for her Bible study that morning.

I had talked to her just the day before because it was my daughter’s birthday and she’d called to tell me that her present was in the mail. We’d chatted about the kinds of things we always talked about and there was no indication that she wouldn’t be there the next day.

Today, I’m having a sad day. I miss her so much. A lot of stuff has happened in the past year and so many times I’ve wanted to call her and talk. Christmas was hard because had planned to go up to see her and my brother and his wife. They have cats and Beloved and the Boy are allergic so they would have stayed with Mom again and we’d have had Christmas there.

So, we just decided, all of us together, that it would just be easier on all of us to not go up there.

The past year has been one of tears and frustration as we dealt with her estate and what to do with all her things. It was one time I realized what it means to really be an adult. These were all things my brother and I wanted Mom to handle for us!!

This past year has seen my brother deal with many health issues and the loss of his job. I’ve dealt with sciatica and two steroid shots in my back, not to mention behavioral issues with our son and getting that under control.

My daughter turned 21 yesterday which is a big deal but today I’m a little sad.

Mommy, I miss you, and I hope you, Daddy and Dotti are partying in heaven and holding a place for me.

My mother died on September 3, 2009, the day after the Girl celebrated her 20th birthday. It’s been about 6 weeks since she died, and you know, most of the time, I’m doing okay…sort of.

I go about my daily life and things go along the way they did before 3 September. Beloved and the Girl head to LSU every morning and the Boy goes to school, I have dinners to prepare and laundry to do and my books to write, and the sun shines.

But it doesn’t. Not really.

We’ve had some on-going issues. My van died before I got home from the week of funerals and stress and food that started on Labor Day. The van is over 10 years old and it’s time for it to just be donated somewhere. Due to our family’s situation, we want to donate it to Kidney Cars.

Well, it has turned out to be a major hassle. Between trying to figure out Kidney Cars’ rules and get all the forms filled out and notarized, it’s taken forever. Then today we found out that while I did have the title to fill out the forms online, the title Beloved took with him today was for a different car.

The Girl went to the ER with some minor digestive issues. She’s okay but I was freaked out last night waiting for Beloved to bring her home.

The Boy still has some behavioral issues and while I called his psychologist last week, she hasn’t called me back to talk about a pharmaceutical option. I’ll have to call a pediatrician tomorrow.

I have some peridonital issues I can’t even think about dealing with yet,

Probably if I were in a different frame of mind, these things wouldn’t seem so huge.

A friend of mind brought me flowers and food a week or so ago. Her mother works with the bereavement ministry at our church, so she brought me a couple of pamphlets from there. I guess I thought that since I was home and dealing with my every day life, I was okay.

I need to be gentle with myself and realize that it’s going to be some time, a long time, before I’m not still grieving. It’s only been about 6 weeks.

Tomorrow I’m flying up to Akron, Ohio, with my father-in-law. We’re renting a truck to drive some of Mom’s furniture and other stuff like that. Maybe that’s why my heart is so broken today. I really don’t want to deal with this.

Yes, in a mercenary, selfish, way I want her sewing stuff and I want the furniture and paintings, but more than that, I wish she were still here to use them and I wouldn’t have to do this.

I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to go up there, although my brother and his wife live there and I love them and want to see them again, but you know what? I saw them last month and it was hard.

Okay, enough of this. I need to try to focus on something else.

Thanks for listening!

Life has been crazy around here lately.

A little over a week ago, my mother-in-law called.They live in New Jersey and this was Friday, last week. The first words out of her mouth were, “Surprise. We’ll be there Sunday.”

Now, a little context. I had my brother on the other line. He lives in Ohio and has been going through the same kind of medical stuff I went through before my transplant, and while he’s not sick like I was, he’s having a tough time of it. Fortunately, this conversation had been just something kinda fun, so I was able to just tell him she was on the phone and they were apparently coming to visit. He understood and I went back to her.

They’ve been trying to sell their house for at least two years so they could move down here. Well, they finally got a good, solid offer and were coming down to look at houses.

A little context on my end: Beloved was in California and due home the next morning (Saturday). We had been invited to a wedding reception Saturday evening and some time in the afternoon we were suppose to see Star Trek. Then on Sunday, the Boy had a birthday party to go to.

I told her she might need to kick her way through clutter to find their bed, but she said not to worry about it.

They were here when we got home from Mass Sunday evening. The Boy had school Monday and Tuesday, Beloved went to work, and the Girl stayed home. The grandparents had driven HER car down – that is, they have been promising her this car when they moved or this summer, whichever came first. In fact, she had been making plans to fly up to NJ this summer with a friend and drive her car back.

Well, now it’s in my driveway. Needless to say, the Girl is thrilled. It’s an old, huge boat of a car, covered with Marine Corps logos and filled with waste material that used to be “useful” gadgets, but it’s hers. Now she has to get it registered and inspected and all that.

Wednesday was the kindergarten end of year paraliturgy, so the grandparents got to see it.

They looked at houses every day and on Thursday, signed the contract for one.

It’s a small, almost cottage like house, 8 years old, 4 bedrooms about a mile and a half from us. So, yay!

They left Friday morning.

Saturday was a HeartLA meeting. I spoke about Internet resources for fantasy writers and social networking sites. Not too exciting, but at lunch, my friend Rhonda, who has sold a couple of novella’s but hasn’t posted that news on her site and who is also in my critique group, told me I need to finish the bridesmaid dress book, which I’m now calling Catering to Carter. This is the first in what I hope will be three (maybe four) books in the Fairy Godmother’s Bridesmaid Dress series.

So, I’ve been working on that while Beloved edits three chapters of Sword & Illusion.